Is it time to close the “Bank of Mom and Dad”?

For generations, parents have tried to give their children a better start in life — whether that means helping with education, a first car, a deposit on a home, or simply stepping in when things get tough.

But in a world of rising living costs and delayed financial independence, many parents are asking a difficult question: When does helping your child become holding them back?

It’s the growing debate around the “Bank of Mom and Dad” — and on HOT Business with Jeremy Maggs, powered by Standard Bank, Lana Johnson, Franchise Principal and Financial Adviser at Consult by Momentum, unpacked why the answer is not always simple.

Listen to his full interview below:

Johnson says the desire to help comes from the right place.

“We’re automatically wired to want to do as much as we can for our children,” she explains, adding that many parents naturally want to protect their kids from the struggles they faced growing up.

And today’s young adults are navigating a very different financial landscape.

Higher living costs mean many genuinely need more support than previous generations — but Johnson warns there is a difference between offering a helping hand and creating dependence.

The key, she says, is boundaries.

“Helping in itself is not a bad thing,” Johnson says. “Where it becomes blurry is when we’re trying to assist without firm boundaries.”

That may mean setting expectations, timelines, or having honest conversations about money — something many families still avoid.

Johnson believes financial challenges can also provide valuable life lessons, teaching resilience, problem-solving, and independence.

“If everything is easy and the path is smooth, there’s very little opportunity to learn,” she says.

For parents who would rather share their wealth while they are alive instead of leaving an inheritance, Johnson says there’s nothing wrong with that approach — provided it’s done with purpose, rather than becoming a constant “drip feed”.

And when should the Bank of Mom and Dad finally close?

Johnson says a first job is often a natural turning point — although every family’s circumstances are different.

The bigger lesson? The best financial gift parents can offer may not always be money itself, but the confidence and skills to manage it.